Chococatt

LOWS

2007-01-31T02:10:00.001-08:00

Hellows>
i wish result relaese on 5 feb, at least ill know if i need to catch up on my work a not! If i can go jc, den i attend finish the first 3 months lorsss.
But i think i prepared to get the result already, even if retain, i will be able to take it... I'm really damn not confident in the Os level. My prelim was lots better. haha. ( blood duunoo why gushing into my head )
This few weeks in YJC i gained 5 kgs.. now 55 kg leh! so fat... haha, the food not bad. Somemore i stress i eat not stressed also eat, c ppl eat i eat, c him eat i eat, c cat eat i eat, whatever, just c food will eat.
My faverate drink ---- the rebina! But me bottles!
Look forward to seeing them on Sat.. how they will suai me for my weight height and haha skin tone ( racist sia) But still look forward.
Havent change a bit dont i? I wonder how's THEY become liao lor... Maybe shiling become more ... pigguish
huiyan... Taller? thinner? Happier?
Sheena ... More violent? or gentle?
hahaz, dont keep me in suspense, sians

70775

2007-01-26T08:31:00.000-08:00

I bought "it started with a kiss" hoho. At least there's something to keep me entertained for now.
Fengling quit JC le, den Jihui thinking, Wee xiang Quit, David quit liao come back, (stopped by E.T.) And me leh? I kept thinking when will all these end... Tired! But must preservere... I cannot help but agree that teacher here are very nice ppl, they dont rush for classes, and can explain again and again. Jus what i needed. But i really cannot stand the timetable, everytime when reach 2 pm my eyes coming to fully closed. staying till 5 pm? ( lying flat on the table and drooling abit, with eyes flipped upwards and head v heavy ! ) Food already cannot help to keep me awake. PS : i almost slept with a chocolate in my mouth!
I still find innova intiminating, like somehow the building shouldnt be there... i dunno how to explain but it's like a school out of nowhere tt kind of feel. So YJ is better
Got one habit: Everytime i go into a class i'll write my name on the table, so as to record if i came to ths class b4, but not very accurate hor? haha
Not everything must stick to the end de, though i think its a pity, but it's only a pity for me,so must why forget abt it and move on. ( no one knows what the hell crap i talking )
Some ppl are sad, but sad... not entirely their fault.
Audrey, do you remember the video i watched over and over again? Sumtimes i feel like them too, sian sian dunno do what. Actually hanging out with a group of ppl is better than staaying at home to rot la. ( though still cham) At least a better chance to be happy.
Tml going out? Den i dun go nyp le...
mom haven come home
Ah ma came today. So good! Got dinner! i didnt ate tonite!

YOZOO

2007-01-22T05:53:00.000-08:00

Endure! AND face it! i think tt's all i can do haha... hopefully i can overcome it. some would know what i talking about.
Happy birthday! my Dearest mom turn 45. though she never would c this, I wish she could grow strong and live happily singlely! There's no need to have a parthner you know?! Jux enjoy your 45th year on planet earth... hehe!
To ease your part, i'll wash my own socks and shoes this year! ( i mean the whole process hor! ) LOLs
Cannot blog more, got tv to watch and things to do... haiz
Everyone must jiayou! I know Jan is the worse part of the year! (suicide rates also very high sia)
Anyone have anyways to overcoe any fears??? I need some...

What you want?

2007-01-20T07:20:00.000-08:00

I dunno already larz I dun care larz!
MAD!!! Qi Si Le!
But having second thoughts...

Bored

2007-01-19T04:49:00.000-08:00

life is boring now... I have no idea how to make it interesting...
but i really look forward to meeting back my friends from old schools. Miss the times where we crack lame jokes, suai each other and eat together! Now i feel very boring... nothing seems nice haiz...
Someone! save me by organising an event ba! ( nice)

Birdie

2007-01-12T09:21:00.000-08:00

We were going to catch a movie (dN2) at causeway, but it rained big... slowed down our speed. Wells it was fun to walk in the rain!
Huijia say i dunno what la, funnily held the umbrella to the birds in the rain. I was just testing wad!!! Maybe if they were a bit more clever they may follow me to the shelter. * birds and cats should be enemy one leh*
But home was sian, my brother lo, use my cd player nvr ask even fan my favs cds! ^ jay chou rox ^ He asked me to buy him a mp3 for his bd. gosh, he's only 12 lo, my first mp3 was when i was 15 and moreover i didnt asked for it- given by aunt. Now mine's spoilt i haven got a replacement and he asked for one...
Got scolding again, mooommy asked me to wash the veg called " bai chai" i go wash " kai lan" ... haiz but i think she's a bit demanding la, for summore like me who cant remember if i got eat, sleep or school... veg is no big thing .. i shld try to remember those big ones firsts
Emily teo (gpt ct) say cannot late more that 3... i die liao lo...

Sok

2007-01-12T09:10:00.000-08:00

What kind of mother 1 am haven come home and have a daughter waiting up for her??? my mum la, the one of the kind
hey guys, listen to that song its damn goods lors. hahas must ask xq hear!
Aint jc the place i wanted? why there liao i feel so sian? now i feel like going poly... hahaz. hy decided on poly le? There's a course i wanted to c so much -- the avaition management! it's about airport operations la, maybe studying that course can get me a chance to c the world...
Am i thinking of that becuz i dont like my home? hmmm thinking
btw! i guiltly watched deathnote2 and today saw Alvin zhenyu and shakir at yishun BK! Asked them with audrey and huijia to go to LJS with me! hehe... hy is recently writing stories in her blog, she sure got time sia... how i wish... ( im not les hor! )
I'm quite jealous that many ppl have that hp with cam ones... i want one, so i can take pics everywhere. Should have c the photography club... no time leh. I dun wish to go dance, many many many reasons not to. sigh, what can i say?
wish to learn an intrument and stop being tone deaf for once!

How to be a great engager?

2007-01-11T03:39:00.000-08:00

There's several things i wish to learn lately... like below

1. Languages : Korean, Cantonese, Japanese and German
2. Truth :There's been many many statements ppls made about being applied in life, but the problem is really???
3. The art of talking : sumtimes i feel like i just lack topics and enthu to open my mouth and talk.. haha
4. xin li xue! ( and reading the minds of ppl )

Read's hy's blog... She really practising English! haha wells work hard!
I feel a tiny little bit regreting for not wating for them to watch deathnote 2
yes! i watched deathnote 2 today haha
so sorry i couldnt wait any longer... the ending was classic man. Wish we could watch together, really!

oh ya! anyone with advices for me on.. everything? I'm really really in need for some... cuz i very bored

Today's feeling:Happy
Satisfied
Delighted
Scared
Embarrassed
Disappointed
Self- doubting
goshs i feel so much in one day

wo

2007-01-07T21:53:00.000-08:00

Happy from the heart.

2006-09-28T06:35:00.000-07:00

I am never ever used to feel happy ( fully) from my heart. It's usually with a ting of sadness somehow. So I cannot understand why people can be so happy about events and suprises when for me there's so much to worry later haha.
Sl say that hy grew up liao, i culdnt believe it. did she? I only felt she get older only. And maybe its just a 3 min thingy, scc how it goes in the future... den i decide. Sl say she may not be able to take it like hy for the exam i think. hmmm, i dunno i dunno i dunno. If i say i could and i couldnt very paiseh, if i say i couldnt then i coulds means i not confident in myself.. so both there's risk!

I'm setting downcast.

2006-09-28T06:05:00.000-07:00

The prelims is finally over. I kinda hate to deal with exam periods. Besides the self-critical feeling piling up, I still need to face ... Many negative things. Prelims is indeed a waste of time. Days flew away... Ha
Being a introvert ideal seeker, ( meaning I'm selfcritcal high and unrealistic in expectation for myself, easily taken advantage of due to inexpressiveness, seen as aloof although I DO feel like other fellow human beings) Exam stretches me... Being too self absorbed, I missed out. I tried not to think about things but I just cant. My mind wander off... Its like when the paper isnt 100 marks i just think i did very badly. more questions i dont know how to do the more i doubt my own intelligence and future. I'm such a pathetic.
Part of me is a security seeker ( means want stablilty and warm peace and happy atmosphere.) What de the exams do? it create a tension... i dont like competition but this is not acceptable in the society... Here, you compete, you win or you lose... So i thought the at most i could do is to JUST know whether if my standard stays! For example : im usually around ABCDE's mark range if i had fallen out of this range of people, I got worse... isnt it like that?
After the exams things never got better for some time...
Maybe im expecting too much. It's fair this way? - you dont trust me i dont need to trust you either. Then who started this trusting thing? dunno dumb or clever c in the future. I tried! And i dunno
anyway just one more questions tt i need answers, suppose your friend is a good friend in times of pleasure and fun, but when danger comes do friends get impatient? Or what do they do? I dunno. i dunno what is the right view in fellow mankind eyes. I thought perhaps the trust and the 'looking up to you' is not adequately present.
Vivian said that I'm very act Chen mo... no lo, i got so much to think about it's hard.

Ah ma lai le

2006-09-06T03:55:00.000-07:00

*am
Today got cHem praC!!! haha! i dunno, i dun think i prepared... i feel tt ill forget something one haha. Hope the test turn out fine.
1pm
Reached home, bought lunch for my brother, yet he ate already! what can i say? I asked him to eat another time lo. Prac test was not fine... After the test i kept reminding myself " Dont dwell over it dont dont!!! " and also " Dont find companian!!!" I didnt want to keep anyone listening to my whining. Went home lo play sims2... hoho... I prisoned a sim character... lol who tell her so bad slap my character!!! lols ... Hao you zhi o.o !
But i'm quite worried... seen hy's blog .... she say she very worried... but.. " about what?" hehz. I dunno whether im lazy/giveuphope/lost/upset/depressed/became optimistic.... but i cant feel myself working hard for tt stupid prelim... i should right? afterall i dont have what others do... haha
2pm
Audrey dunno go where. intended to talk to her and tell her my chem prac is not better than hers ... lols I think her brother answer?! or father? Yesterdays' burger nice!!! Thank you!
430pm
my Grandma came to visit. or should say " helpout" i can feel tt my grandparents dote on my mum alot... i feel that dey think my mom is the " weak link".
Grandma's the best... Brought herb soup and popian!!! Cool! I dont know how to thank her...
If you were me what would you do?
1. Hug her from the back and say grandma youre the best!
2. mumble a thank you tt she cannot hear?
or 3. Sincerely look into her eyes and say ty?
I did none... dunno i dun feel like im any of those above... 1 is like wang ren fu in tfkc... 2 is like the cool guy... and 3? ?? huili? haha tt's what i feel lols.
7pm
havent started studying gosh.. the tv is the worst invention is the world... virtual-illusion social world... haha dunno wth i thinking
PS: I feel strange around her lately, i suspect tt she is observing me and i am a perfectionism, I don like disapproval... But must learn to accept them...

out of the blue

2006-09-03T08:54:00.000-07:00

Jus got to know tt there's test on the hey maths. I rushed throught them like siao... twenty minute 2 ppr.. hahabut i still got full mark for one lol. Tml going library to study. haiz Im still at the same page for chemistry.
I wonder how's audrey is doing ... nvr contact for quite long ( 1 week) Did anything happeneD? Btw, i really thank you for tt lucky charm book!!! I hope you are alright! :>
hy: I'm seriously warning you... i dun secretly admire someone one!!! I'm not tt kind... not lesbian... I have my own goals and not a boy fanatic!!! gosh... The way i smile, i never noticed... hardly look in the mirror smiling to myself not like you...!!! haha
hmmm, I think my English oral is doom, so i need to work hard on it
Prelim ?! ? i think im bound to do ok ok la... but my essay is a crap and my prac is a joke... lolz let's hope for a miracle for me... Bless me pls...

On the Bus

2006-08-30T06:46:00.000-07:00

"Fu mu en qin" why would some one tattoo this on their fingers? He's doesnt much older... but I'm unable to uderstand why.
If I have time, i definitely find a way to type in Chinese, i feel more comfortable and easy to express feeling and thoughts, since i think in Chinese...
How come tt auntie over there knows the other? Do they know i'm getting off next stop? I felt like the think i'm thin! The ah so on the left wants my position ( cause wont fall down) but i cant move... haha.
I feel a little blur, like everyone has schemes... ya as if... if you think you are the most evil person on your world, you probably let your guards down a little thinking tt people are not as evil as you wont you?

StarT

2006-08-26T08:58:00.000-07:00

New Beginning post! ^_^